{"id":13919,"date":"2015-01-04T18:00:29","date_gmt":"2015-01-04T17:00:29","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.fjala.info\/?p=2654"},"modified":"2015-01-04T18:00:29","modified_gmt":"2015-01-04T17:00:29","slug":"bisha-me-cifteli","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/fjala.info\/2009-2015\/bisha-me-cifteli\/","title":{"rendered":"Bisha me \u00e7ifteli"},"content":{"rendered":"

Tregim <\/em><\/p>\n

Gani MEHMETAJ<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"\" E takova n\u00eb Gjenev\u00eb n\u00eb nj\u00eb manifestim kulturor shqiptaro-zviceran\u00eb. Kur e pash pas tet\u00eb vjet\u00ebsh, rrymimi i fort\u00eb me nj\u00eb ngroht\u00ebsi p\u00ebrv\u00ebluese, ma p\u00ebrshkoi gjith\u00eb shtatin, me la forca, mu shk\u00ebput\u00ebn gjymtyr\u00ebt, nuk i zot\u00ebroja dot l\u00ebvizjet, gjoksi me shtr\u00ebngonte me nj\u00eb dhimbje t\u00eb fort\u00eb, nd\u00ebrsa k\u00ebmb\u00ebt vet\u00ebm sa nuk m\u00eb l\u00ebshuan. Asnj\u00ebher\u00eb n\u00eb jet\u00ebn time nuk ndjeva dob\u00ebsi m\u00eb t\u00eb madhe dhe nj\u00eb \u00e7akordim t\u00eb till\u00eb t\u00eb shtatit. As at\u00ebher\u00eb kur ma l\u00ebshuan rrym\u00ebn elektrike n\u00ebp\u00ebr gjymtyr\u00eb. E pash turbullt. Mu duk sikur me fanitej. Nuk doja t\u00eb besoja q\u00eb ishte real. Vetja me dukej si vi\u00e7 q\u00eb nuk ka as shprehje sysh, as mimik\u00eb fytyre, as mask\u00eb, por vet\u00ebm shikim shkretan\u00eb q\u00eb nuk thoshte asgj\u00eb dhe nuk shprehte asnj\u00eb ndjenj\u00eb.<\/p>\n

Ai m\u00eb shikoi ftoht\u00eb. Sikur nuk me njihte, sikur takoheshim p\u00ebr her\u00eb t\u00eb par\u00eb, por q\u00eb nuk kishte asnj\u00eb interes p\u00ebr mua. Madje edhe kureshtja p\u00ebr nj\u00eb t\u00eb panjohur, q\u00eb i kishte dal rast\u00ebsisht p\u00ebrball\u00eb, i mungonte. Ma kaloi fytyr\u00ebn me shikim prej eskimezi, sikur t\u00eb isha qenia m\u00eb e par\u00ebnd\u00ebsishme e planetit pa asnj\u00eb d\u00ebshir\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb pakt\u00ebn t\u00eb m\u00eb p\u00ebrsh\u00ebndeste me nj\u00eb l\u00ebvizje koke, sepse ishim p\u00ebrball\u00eb: vet\u00ebm un\u00eb dhe ai. Kishte edhe nj\u00eb grua n\u00eb krah, mir\u00ebpo ajo dukej si leck\u00eb q\u00eb iu kishte varur n\u00eb supe, sepse gati nuk ishte me te dhe nuk me shikonte fare.<\/p>\n

Ajo ishte p\u00ebrqendruar n\u00eb ekspozit\u00ebn e librave e t\u00eb fotografive, ku un\u00eb duhej t\u00eb isha ciceroni q\u00eb kisha marr\u00eb obligim nga organizatori t\u2019ua shpjegoja njer\u00ebzve ato q\u00eb ishin renditur faqe murit shqip e fr\u00ebngjisht. Dhe derisa shikoja si nj\u00eb vi\u00e7, ai kaloi para meje po aq indiferent\u00eb sikur n\u00eb \u00e7astin kur ma sh\u00ebtiti fytyr\u00ebn me shikimin bardh\u00eb. Pak m\u00eb tutje ndenji para nj\u00eb fotografie, pastaj u largua qetas e me ngatht\u00ebsi, sikur ta kishte n\u00eb dispozicion gjith\u00eb koh\u00ebn e bot\u00ebs. Mua mu duk ecje shp\u00ebrfill\u00ebse deri n\u00eb arroganc\u00eb, q\u00eb vazhdonte t\u00eb m\u00eb paralizonte.<\/p>\n

Kur me erdhi pak forc\u00eb ika nga salloni dhe u mbylla n\u00eb nj\u00eb kthin\u00eb t\u00eb ngusht\u00eb, q\u00eb t\u00eb ngopesha me aj\u00ebr.<\/p>\n

\u201c\u00cbsht\u00eb Ai\u201d, – i thash me shqet\u00ebsim kolegut, q\u00eb me shikoi me habi dhe pa me kuptuar, por q\u00eb kaloi pa me pyetur m\u00eb shum\u00eb. Ishte m\u00ebsuar me sjelljet e mia ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb t\u00eb \u00e7uditshme p\u00ebr te. Nuk e di sa koh\u00eb kaloi, por kur u k\u00ebndella dhe b\u00ebra ball\u00eb t\u00eb dilja n\u00eb sallonin e ekspozit\u00ebs aty nuk kishte asnj\u00ebri. U leht\u00ebsova… Ika n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi i d\u00ebrmuar.<\/p>\n

*
\nNuk e keni iden\u00eb se si \u00ebsht\u00eb t\u00eb takosh ish-torturuesin, i cili me ka rrahur pa m\u00ebshir\u00eb e brutalisht, derisa i humbisja ndjenjat. Dhe, kur k\u00ebndellesha i lar\u00eb n\u00eb gjak, q\u00eb tashm\u00eb ishte mpiksur, at\u00eb e d\u00ebgjoja disa hapa tutje se si i binte \u00e7iftelis\u00eb dhe e k\u00ebndonte k\u00ebng\u00ebn e Ahmet Delis\u00eb n\u00eb kup\u00eb t\u00eb qiellit, sikur t\u00eb mos kishte ndodhur asgj\u00eb. I mbledhur kruspull n\u00eb dyshemen\u00eb e ftoht\u00eb t\u00eb betonit, r\u00ebnkoja mbyturazi nga dhimbjet e grushteve t\u00eb tij, nd\u00ebrsa tash po ata gishta t\u00eb cil\u00ebt para disa or\u00ebsh ishin b\u00ebr\u00eb grusht q\u00eb me shkaktonin dhimbje zgjateshin n\u00ebp\u00ebr telat e \u00e7iftelis\u00eb. Z\u00ebri q\u00eb pak m\u00eb par\u00eb ul\u00ebrinte, tash p\u00ebrvijonte i zvargur n\u00ebp\u00ebr kadencat e telave t\u00eb \u00e7iftelis\u00eb dhe e ndiqte vij\u00ebn melodike, sipas ritmit t\u00eb k\u00ebng\u00ebs. Ishte pas mesnat\u00ebs, kur ai e p\u00ebrfundonte seanc\u00ebn e dajakut, sikurse e quante…<\/p>\n

Net t\u00eb t\u00ebra i kalova pa gjum\u00eb. E urreja vet\u00ebn q\u00eb u tregova i qullt\u00eb at\u00eb pasdite qershori n\u00eb ekspozit\u00ebn e librave e t\u00eb fotografive n\u00eb Gjenev\u00eb. Nuk e gjeja arsyen e k\u00ebsaj dob\u00ebsie. Me vinte e papritur se si isha b\u00ebr\u00eb k\u00ebshtu. Sa her\u00eb kisha \u00ebnd\u00ebrruar hakmarrjen. Mu kthye ankthi i muajve t\u00eb tortur\u00ebs. Me dol\u00ebn p\u00ebrpara pamjet e t\u00eb gjitha fazave: arrestimi, rrahjet, net\u00ebt e pagjum\u00eb me drit\u00ebn e fort\u00eb elektrike mbi sy, Ai q\u00eb ul\u00ebrinte dhe pastaj i binte shtruar \u00e7iftelis\u00eb.<\/p>\n

Fillova s\u00ebrish ta ndjeja dhimbjen e grushteve t\u00eb tij q\u00eb mi veshte fytyr\u00ebs me eg\u00ebrsin\u00eb e bish\u00ebs. Nd\u00ebrsa ndjeja dh\u00ebmb\u00ebt e mi q\u00eb k\u00ebrc\u00ebllinin me mllef e t\u00ebrbim. Dhe at\u00ebbot\u00eb isha i gatsh\u00ebm ta kafshoja si tigri i \u00e7artur, po t\u00eb kisha mund\u00ebsi, po t\u00eb me lejonin, por isha i pafuqish\u00ebm: b\u00ebja p\u00ebrpara, madje ngrihesha n\u00eb k\u00ebmb\u00eb me gjith\u00eb karrige, por prap\u00eb bija me rrap\u00ebllim\u00eb n\u00eb tok\u00eb duke u rrokullisur, sepse duart mi kishin lidhur pas karriges me nj\u00eb tel t\u00eb holl\u00eb \u00e7eliku, q\u00eb mi priste ky\u00e7et sa her\u00eb l\u00ebvizja. Gjunj\u00ebt m\u00eb b\u00ebheshin gjak kur bija n\u00eb dyshemen\u00eb e zhveshur, meq\u00eb p\u00ebrpiqesha t\u00eb mos rr\u00ebzohesha n\u00eb b\u00ebrryla, sa her\u00eb bija n\u00eb b\u00ebrryla me kapte korrenti i gjymtyr\u00ebve dhe me vinte t\u00eb vjell.<\/p>\n

Kur me kalonte t\u00ebrbimi i par\u00eb nga kund\u00ebrgoditja e prangave n\u00eb k\u00ebmb\u00eb, dhe e telit t\u00eb holl\u00eb ky\u00e7eve ia ktheja me refren pa u ndalur: \u201cQen, bir\u00eb kudre, zagar i shkive!\u201d. E ai me shihte gjakftoht\u00ebsi. Humbisja ndjenjat, shkrihesha n\u00eb pafund\u00ebsi…<\/p>\n

Me k\u00ebndellte trupi i d\u00ebrmuar, buz\u00ebt e p\u00ebrc\u00eblluara e t\u00eb \u00ebnjtura q\u00eb nuk mund t\u2019i l\u00ebvizja. As kok\u00ebn q\u00eb me dukej e madhe sa nj\u00eb gur mulliri, nuk mund ta prekja e as ta kruaja, megjith\u00ebse gungat me digjnin dhe me dhembnin aq sa do t\u00eb gj\u00ebmoja si lehon\u00eb gjat\u00eb lindjes po t\u00eb mos me vinte inat nga Ai-xhelati. Ose bisha, si\u00e7 e quanin t\u00eb burgosurit.<\/p>\n

Ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb kur rrinte me gjat\u00eb me thoshte me ciniz\u00ebm: \u201cZoti me ka fal\u00eb t\u2019i bie \u00e7iftelis\u00eb e jo t\u00eb merrem me budallenj si puna jote! Trego argat\u00eb i kujt je dhe shko n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi se t\u00eb presin\u201d, – ma kthente me nj\u00eb ton tjet\u00ebr: t\u00eb but\u00eb, gati lut\u00ebs. N\u00eb k\u00ebrc\u00ebnimet e mia kur isha n\u00eb kulmin e t\u00ebrbimit ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb denjonte t\u00eb m\u00eb kthente p\u00ebrgjigjen me ciniz\u00ebm: \u201cAshtu ta merr mendja ty. Kurr\u00eb nuk do t\u00eb te vjen rasti ta nxjerr\u00ebsh hakun\u201d. I shtremb\u00ebronte buz\u00ebt me p\u00ebrbuzje dhe vazhdonte me z\u00ebrin e qet\u00eb: \u201cNuk je as i pari dhe as i fundit q\u00eb me k\u00ebrc\u00ebnon. E di ti, si do t\u00eb sillesh po u takove rast\u00ebsisht me mua n\u00eb rrug\u00eb? Do t\u00eb skuqesh nga inati dhe do t\u00eb ma kthesh shpin\u00ebn sa m\u00eb par\u00eb, n\u00ebse nuk do t\u00eb kesh koh\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb kalosh n\u00eb an\u00ebn tjet\u00ebr t\u00eb trotuarit\u201d.<\/p>\n

Me tregonte me po at\u00eb gjakftoht\u00ebsi se si nj\u00eb burr\u00eb m\u00eb i fort\u00eb se un\u00eb e jo \u201cadoleshent i papjekur\u201d, i cili e kishte k\u00ebrc\u00ebnuar se do ta b\u00ebnte copa, se eshtrat do t\u2019ia thyente si pul\u00ebs dhe do t\u00eb k\u00ebnaqej pastaj n\u00eb ul\u00ebrim\u00ebn e tij, kur e takonte n\u00ebp\u00ebr korridore t\u00eb policis\u00eb jo vet\u00ebm se nuk e kishte mbajtur premtimin, por e kishte ulur kok\u00ebn dhe kishte vazhduar rrug\u00ebn si qeni me bisht nd\u00ebr shal\u00eb. \u201cPrandaj, – vazhdonte ai me ciniz\u00ebm (nd\u00ebrsa mua me dhembte \u00e7do gjymtyr\u00eb), – mos i premto vet\u00ebs shum\u00eb, mos e ngarko vet\u00ebn, se pastaj ka rrezik t\u00eb te mos z\u00eb gjumi dhe t\u00eb del vetja hujit\u201d.<\/p>\n

P\u00ebrpiqesha t\u00eb veja n\u00eb l\u00ebvizje mimik\u00ebn e fytyr\u00ebs e t\u00eb buz\u00ebve q\u00eb nuk i kisha fare n\u00ebn kontroll, sepse ishin t\u00eb \u00ebnjtura si kukullat kineze, p\u00ebr ta formuar nj\u00eb shprehje p\u00ebrbuz\u00ebse, por nuk arrija. Vet\u00ebm ofshaja, nd\u00ebrsa dhimbjet me shtoheshin n\u00eb \u00e7do l\u00ebvizje t\u00eb muskujve t\u00eb l\u00ebnduar. Kalova net t\u00eb tilla t\u00eb r\u00ebnda e t\u00eb frikshme, q\u00eb armikut nuk do t\u2019ia d\u00ebshiroja mes grushteve t\u00eb tij me tingujt e \u00e7iftelis\u00eb, t\u00eb cil\u00ebn deri at\u00ebher\u00eb rrall\u00eb e kam d\u00ebgjuar, nd\u00ebrsa sot e k\u00ebsaj dite nuk e duroj dot. Ma kujton xhelatin tim dhe ng\u00ebrdheshjet e tij t\u00eb vazhdueshme.<\/p>\n

Pastaj sikur nuk i mjaftonin grushtet q\u00eb m\u2019i jepte pa m\u00ebshir\u00eb, ma afronte nxeh\u00ebsen elektrike mbi tavolin\u00eb q\u00eb, kur fillonte e frynte ma bymente aq shum\u00eb trurin, saq\u00eb kisha p\u00ebrshtypjen se koka m\u00eb b\u00ebhej sa Pallati i Rilindjes, nd\u00ebrkaq ai her\u00eb me afrohej e b\u00ebhej gjigant\u00eb, her\u00eb me largohej duke u zvog\u00ebluar si kokrrizat n\u00eb ekranin e televizionit, kur nd\u00ebrpritet korrenti. Dhe kur filloja t\u00eb djersija nga sikleti, illonte: \u201cKush t\u00eb ka th\u00ebn\u00eb t\u00eb shkruash parulla armiq\u00ebsore (i quanet k\u00ebshtu inicial\u00ebt KR)!? Kush t\u2019i dha librat e ndaluara?!\u201d<\/p>\n

Un\u00eb heshtja. Me vinte her\u00eb t\u00eb qeshja n\u00eb kup\u00eb t\u00eb qiellit, her\u00eb t\u00eb qaja deri n\u00eb ngash\u00ebrim, sepse nuk ma kishte marr mendja se nj\u00eb shkrepje kok\u00ebkrisur e dy shok\u00ebve t\u00eb mi nga gjimnazi, q\u00eb t\u00eb bridhnin nat\u00ebn e t\u00eb shkruanim parulla, n\u00ebp\u00ebr asfalt e mure, do t\u00eb na kushtonte kaq shum\u00eb. Madje, aventura jon\u00eb e pasmesnat\u00ebs u b\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u2019ua d\u00ebshmuar shoqeve tona guximin dhe sa kok\u00ebkrisur q\u00eb ishim. Doja ta shihja reagimin e Fjoll\u00ebs, shoqes s\u00eb bank\u00ebs s\u00eb tret\u00eb, ndaj s\u00eb cil\u00ebs ndjeja nj\u00eb emocion deri n\u00eb eksitim. Ajo vdiste pas djemve t\u00eb guximsh\u00ebm. Mua me shkrepi t\u00eb tregohesha i till\u00eb n\u00eb nj\u00eb \u00e7ast euforie. S\u2019m\u00eb shkonte n\u00eb mend se do t\u00eb m\u00eb kapnin.<\/p>\n

Pas dy muajsh t\u00eb seancave intensive, kur nuk pat\u00ebn \u00e7\u2019t\u00eb nxjerrin m\u00eb, m\u00eb d\u00ebnuan me kat\u00ebr vjet burg. Isha i lumtur q\u00eb shp\u00ebtova nga ajo bish\u00eb me mbr\u00ebmjeve i binte \u00e7iftelis\u00eb.<\/p>\n

Kurr\u00eb m\u00eb nuk e takova as korridoreve t\u00eb Stacionit t\u00eb policis\u00eb as korridoreve t\u00eb burgut. Me degdis\u00ebn n\u00eb nj\u00eb burg slloven, ku u treguan shum\u00eb m\u00eb njer\u00ebzor ndaj meje. Disa muaj i kalova n\u00ebp\u00ebr spitale p\u00ebr t\u00eb sh\u00ebruar plag\u00ebt dhe traumat.<\/p>\n

*
\nE kisha fjetur mendjen se do ta takoja ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb bot\u00eb Bish\u00ebn me \u00e7ifteli, e kisha harruar fare. Kishte vjet q\u00eb nuk mendoja as p\u00ebr hakmarrje. Gj\u00ebrat u shthur\u00ebn ashtu si\u00e7 nuk me kishte shkuar kurr\u00eb n\u00eb mendje: ish xhelat\u00ebt tan\u00eb i d\u00ebbuan nga puna dhe mbet\u00ebn me gishta n\u00eb goj\u00eb. Me treguan se filluan t\u00eb shiteshin patriot\u00eb. Un\u00eb ika n\u00eb Zvic\u00ebr. Nuk m\u00eb zinte vendin vend n\u00eb vendlindje. Brezi im me dukej i huaj. Nuk i kisha m\u00ebri pse kaluan m\u00eb mir\u00eb se un\u00eb, por nuk e ndjeja vet\u00ebn mir\u00eb n\u00eb mesin e tyre. Ata ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb e ndjenin vet\u00ebn fajtor\u00eb, megjith\u00ebse nuk mendoja se edhe ata \u00ebsht\u00eb dashur t\u00eb vuanin sikur un\u00eb. Dhe pasi fillova nj\u00eb jet\u00eb t\u00eb re, kur me Ai m\u00eb doli p\u00ebrball\u00eb. M\u00eb ktheu n\u00eb nj\u00eb koh\u00eb q\u00eb doja ta shlyeja nga kujtesa. Por, n\u00eb vend t\u00eb saj, ma ngarkoi edhe nj\u00eb kompleks q\u00eb m\u00eb b\u00ebn t\u00eb vuaj: Athua jam frikacak?<\/p>\n

Me vinte plasja q\u00eb nuk gjeta forc\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u2019ia zbrazur mllefin e dikursh\u00ebm, ose t\u00eb pakt\u00ebn p\u00ebr t\u2019ia hedhur nj\u00eb fjal\u00eb p\u00ebrbuz\u00ebse, q\u00eb ta b\u00ebja t\u00eb turp\u00ebrohet. M\u00eb von\u00eb me than\u00eb se Ai, emrin e t\u00eb cilit as tash nuk dua ta p\u00ebrmend, k\u00ebrkonte azil politik. U kishte th\u00ebn\u00eb zyrtar\u00ebve zviceran\u00eb, ashtu me tregoi p\u00ebrkthyesi shqiptar, se ishte i p\u00ebrndjekur nga serb\u00ebt. Gati sa nuk u ngulfata nga nj\u00eb e qeshur histerike q\u00eb ma zuri frym\u00ebn. Kur shoku im i burgut, q\u00eb tash p\u00ebrkthente n\u00eb polici e n\u00eb institucione, me k\u00ebndelli me shpulla fytyr\u00ebs, sepse pati p\u00ebrshtypjen se jam \u00e7mendur, fillova t\u00eb qaj\u00eb. Me vinte turp p\u00ebr at\u00eb q\u00eb b\u00ebra. Dhe e fyeja mikun tim. Fillova ta urrej edhe Zvicr\u00ebn.
\nU ktheva n\u00eb vendlindje dhe hoqa dor\u00eb nga azili e statusi q\u00eb ma dhan\u00eb.<\/p>\n

Nga p\u00ebrmbledhja e tregimeve \u201cKujtime t\u00eb trishta\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Tregim Gani MEHMETAJ E takova n\u00eb Gjenev\u00eb n\u00eb nj\u00eb manifestim kulturor shqiptaro-zviceran\u00eb. Kur e pash pas tet\u00eb vjet\u00ebsh, rrymimi i fort\u00eb me nj\u00eb ngroht\u00ebsi p\u00ebrv\u00ebluese, ma p\u00ebrshkoi gjith\u00eb shtatin, me la forca, mu shk\u00ebput\u00ebn gjymtyr\u00ebt, nuk i zot\u00ebroja dot l\u00ebvizjet, gjoksi me shtr\u00ebngonte me nj\u00eb dhimbje t\u00eb fort\u00eb, nd\u00ebrsa k\u00ebmb\u00ebt vet\u00ebm sa nuk m\u00eb l\u00ebshuan. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7,11],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\nBisha me \u00e7ifteli - FjALA e LIR\u00cb - Arkivi<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/fjala.info\/2009-2015\/bisha-me-cifteli\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"sq_AL\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Bisha me \u00e7ifteli - FjALA e LIR\u00cb - Arkivi\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Tregim Gani MEHMETAJ E takova n\u00eb Gjenev\u00eb n\u00eb nj\u00eb manifestim kulturor shqiptaro-zviceran\u00eb. Kur e pash pas tet\u00eb vjet\u00ebsh, rrymimi i fort\u00eb me nj\u00eb ngroht\u00ebsi p\u00ebrv\u00ebluese, ma p\u00ebrshkoi gjith\u00eb shtatin, me la forca, mu shk\u00ebput\u00ebn gjymtyr\u00ebt, nuk i zot\u00ebroja dot l\u00ebvizjet, gjoksi me shtr\u00ebngonte me nj\u00eb dhimbje t\u00eb fort\u00eb, nd\u00ebrsa k\u00ebmb\u00ebt vet\u00ebm sa nuk m\u00eb l\u00ebshuan. 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